Things I said today

I was in ASDA with the Missus and I found a cheap pair of jeans for her. " If your struggling for cash, how can you afford them?" she asked. " Don't worry about it," I said. " I'll go to the bank in the morning and buy some more money."
Needing a bath, I asked if the bath was going to be cleaned before I used it. " The dirt needs changing," I said.