The bible. Retold

I have decided, after many years of looking at the rights and wrongs of the whole religion thing, to take on something that has only been done, in my opinion, and in a comedy sense, successfully, by Monty Python. Although their take on the whole " Jesus" thing became a huge and popular film success, and i love it, I will be doing my own version.
I'm not going to rush into this, as I'm so busy doing other stuff at the moment, that my take on the bible will have to wait for a little while. And let's face it, the bible has been around long enough and could do with a breath of fresh air.
The whole idea is to make my version of the bible, as funny, and as readable and accessible to all ages.
Within reason.
And just a few idea's to be getting on with, let's bring it up to date a little.
Ok?
Follow that satellite?
3 kings were possibly Elvis, Richard The Lionheart, and Jimmy Carter, the so called peanut King.
Does Spiderman get off with Cleopatra?
Does Cleopatra appear in the Bible?
Does Superman get pissed off with Spiderman?
Is there a threesome?
And what did the butler see?
Do comic book heroes actually appear in the bible?
Does Moses drop 15 tiles?
Was the parting of the Red Sea a typing error?.
Was the 'walking on water' trick performed in Iceland?
Was the turning from water into wine lots of fun?
Wait and see.
With a cast of billions....eventually, including Jesus, John the Baptist " Hi Mum", Peter, John, ( because there's always a John, ) and Judas Iscariot " What money?" and the bloody Romans and many many more. Skate boarding for the blind just got a free half pipe ...with braille.
This is almost serious stuff!! You have been warned.